


Of Fur and Fire

by ZargothraxOtterton



Series: Of Fur and Fire [1]
Category: Alestorm (Band), Gloryhammer (Band), Powerwolf (Band), Sabaton (Band), Zootopia (2016)
Genre: Dimension Travel, Gen, IKEA, Nanowar of Steel, Orden Ogan, Pirate Metal, Power Metal - Freeform, Zootopia (City)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:47:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27485260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZargothraxOtterton/pseuds/ZargothraxOtterton
Summary: Alister Otterton, nephew of Emmitt Otterton, lives a regular teenage life. He listens to heavy metal, goes to school, and loves the mosh pit. However, when a new mystery surrounds the city of Zootopia and his favorite bands, he is eager to find out what is going on. The answer will reveal a true surprise.Contains language and alcohol consumption
Relationships: Dawn Bellwether/Zargothrax, Emmitt Otterton/Mrs. Otterton, Judy Hopps/Nick Wilde
Series: Of Fur and Fire [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2008492
Kudos: 3





	1. A Man With a Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alister Otterton provides an introduction, and his plans for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all. Enjoy the stoatry

Hello everyone, my name is Alister Otterton and I am a River Otter that lives in a big city called Zootopia. I am 18-years-old and go to a high school. I have brown and white fur and a big black snoot (if you don’t know what a snoot is then fuck off). I also wear shorts with zipper pockets so I can mosh without dropping my shit and am rotating around with various power metal shirts. I live in the basement of Emmitt Otterton’s house because he is my Uncle. He was a victim of that hole night howler shit and he looks kinda like a prep version of Angus McFluff. His wife, Ashkii Otterton, also lives in the house and wears purple kinda like Zargothrax does on the “Space 1992” album cover. They also have two children. One of them is named Corey and he plays Fortnite all day which he is too young for because he is only 11-years-old. He is usually shouting which is how you can tell. The younger one is named Piper and she likes soccer and pirate shit and also swears like a fucking sailor, despite her being the ripe age of 8. Oh yeah and I am also on the autism spectrum and ableism is stupid.  
  
One day I was walking back from school while dancing to “Black John” by Stone Sour, which is a dance song no matter what you say. Suddenly I realized I didn’t know where I was looking, and I nearly bumped into a marmot.  
  
“Hey muskrat, watch it!” shouted the marmot.  
  
We then went our separate ways. I then started singing “Diggy Diggy Hole” by Wind Rose which is about digging holes as you can probably see.  
  
I kept walking home and was only a few blocks away. I then started feeling satanic, so I burned down a church and then left.  
  
Once I got back to our house in the Rainforest district, I dumped all my school shit on the ground. It was a Friday and time for a good weekend. I remembered that tonight we were all going to go to an Alestorm concert.  
  
“Hey Alister,” Emmitt said, “How was school.”  
  
“It was fine.” I told him, “someone called me a muskrat but not at school and it happened when I was walking back from school and dancing to Stone Sour.”  
  
“Yeah I’ve been called a Beaver,” Ashkii said.  
  
“Hey who else is ready to go to the Alestorm show tonight!”  
  
“Fuck yes motherfucker I’m fucking ready!” Yelled Piper.  
  
Everyone then went to their respective rooms to change. I came downstairs wearing zipper shorts and a Gloryhammer t-shirt. Emmitt was wearing a black Sabaton shirt. Ashkii was the only one wearing an Alestorm shirt and it had Fannypaws on it. Corey came down wearing an Amon Amarten shirt and was playing Fortnite on his phone. Piper finally came down still wearing the soccer uniform she always wears but was also wearing a black Captain Yarrface ski mask and a pirate hat.  
  
“WHALE CUM TO THE SEA!” Piper shouted.  
  
We then got into the car. I was driving because I could finally drive after midnight and was still too young to drink. We were driving fast and blasting Alestorm, Gloryhammer, and Otter Ogan on full volume.  
  
“Hey, did you realize that all of the greatest metal singers are Musteline?” asked Corey  
  
“Yes indeed,” I said, “Mustelids are great at being metal singers.”  
  
“Hey, I also just saw on Instagram that Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde are going to be at this show.”  
  
“But aren’t they supposed to be catching drug dealers?” Asked Piper.  
  
“Come the fuck on, it’s fucking pirate metal,” Ashkii said.  
  
We eventually arrived at the place of the concert.  
  
(Otter’s Note: Otter Ogan is a play on the band Orden Ogan)


	2. A Pirate's Life For Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alister Otterton and crew go to an Alestorm concert and get drunk.

Chapter 2

We arrived at the venue at which the Alestorm show was happening. We got in line. Suddenly we noticed Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde were right in front of us. They were both wearing Korpiklaani shirts and appeared visibly intoxicated.  
  
“Hey Valister,” Nick shouted drunkenly, “Are you fuckin ready for the motherfuckin’ show tonight?”  
  
“Well Fuck Yeah we’re all fucking ready,” Judy said, also in a very intoxicated way.  
  
“Hey how many drinks have you had?” Ashkii asked them.  
  
“Yeah well, we’ve had 5 so far and plan to have many more throughout the night, Mrs. Otterton” Judy replied.  
  
“RUM IS THE POWER RUM IS THE KEY RUM IS THE THING THAT WILL SET US FREE!” Nick shouted.  
  
The doors opened and we all rushed to the stage. The venue was called The Music Room (great name) and was relatively big sized with a capacity of 2,500. There was a large floor area and a large balcony above it. We of course were on the floor. There was a barricade, but we were still able to get up close to the stage. Alestorm came on and opened with “Treasure Chest Party Quest”. I immediately got into the mosh pit with Piper and Corey and a bunch of other large fuckers who were much larger than I was. Judy and Nick were at the bar the whole time. I kept looking at Christoferret Bowes who was a ferret and had a keytar and was wearing a hat that said “Oh Wow” on it. He was one of the greatest performers I saw. They then kept playing the show. When they started playing “Nancy the Tavern Wench”, I realized that Emmitt and Ashkii were at the bar drinking a lot of fucking rum. They kept playing the show. They eventually closed with “Fucked with an Anchor” and then announced a meet and greet after the show that was going to take place at the merch table.  
  
“THAT WAS FUCKING AWESOME MOTHERFUCKIER,” Piper screamed in a Captain Yarrface voice.  
  
“Hey, let’s go to the merch table and do the meet and greet thing. I’ve always wanted to meet Alestorm,” I told them.  
  
We walked over to the merch table. Emmitt and Ashkii met us there, and they weren’t as drunk as we thought they were.  
  
The band soon arrived “Oi lads did you feckin’ enjoy our show,” Ferret Bowes said in his thick Scottish accent.  
  
“Oh, fuck yeah that was fuckin great,” I told him.  
  
“Ah yes, and I see these two wee lads will be the future. You will grow up to be better pirates than Fannypaws,” He said, pointing to my cousins.  
  
Suddenly another ferret who was not Bowes came up to the merch table.  
  
“Oh, you’ll never be a good singer as me because I have a good number of streams on one song,” said the other Ferret.  
  
“Oh, shit it’s you again,” a drunk Hopps said, “Travis from Bunnyburrow.”  
  
“Yeah it’s me and my band is great.”  
  
“Oh yeah well you had a one hit wonder butt rock band whose latest album only sold 40 copies.”  
  
“yeah but I have 100,000 monthly listeners on Spotify,” Travis said.  
  
“Yeah well, we got 800,000 monthly listeners lad, your pirate ship can eat a giant bag of dicks!” Christoferret Bowes said.  
  
“yeah well my song hit number 14 on the charts.”  
  
“But none of your later songs ever charted,” I told him.  
  
“Fuck yeah,” Bowes said. He then placed his keytar on his crotch to make it look like a dick and started to pelvic thrust back and forth.  
  
“But you will never be as good as my band,” Travis said as he was escorted by security.  
  
“O that was a fucking fuckin fuckin’ fuck fuck fucker fuck,” Nick Wilde said as he wandered around drunkenly, “Oh I’m not gonna have any drinks tomorrow.”  
“Yeah well I’m gonna continue because I haven’t had as much,” said Hopps  
  
“Yeah well fuck it lets offer some alcohol to the youngsters here,” Nick said as he gave us a bunch of rum shots to me as well as Corey and Piper.  
  
Emmitt and Ashkii continued drinking and then got drunk as well. Suddenly I was drunk and so were Corey and Piper. We all started running around drunkenly.  
  
“IF YOU LIKE PINA COLADAS!” Emmitt shouted.  
  
“AND SETTING FIRE TO A CHURCH!” Ashkii responded.  
  
We were playing “P is for Pirate” off a Bluetooth speakers when we hear some noise and then looked up.  
  
“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU MOTHERFUCKERS FUCKING DOING!” It was Chief Bogo.  
  
We were too drunk to fully grasp what was going on until he put us all in the back of his Police Car. We started to drive off to the Police station. He was very furryous.  
“Why were you too, Dick and Moody, so drunk tonight.”  
  
“Yeah well I am the Hootswolf and I am the one and only true god!” Judy shouted.  
  
“SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Bogo shouted, “Why are you this drunk? And why did you let minors consume alcohol.”  
  
“Yeah well the beer from my town is better than yours!” Shouted Nick in an intoxicated manor, “Or Kristoff’s gonna lawn a take on your fucking taking a shit!”  
  
“Tell me, or the both of you are about to get big time fired!” Bogo shouted angrily.  
  
Suddenly, I became relatively sober in a short span of a few seconds. I was finally able to make coherent thoughts.  
  
“Yeah,” I said. “We were just at an Alestorm concert, and it was a great fucking concert. Oh, my fucking god it was great.”  
  
“Yeah, there were entire bags of dicks onstage and a giant pirate ship went around eating them,” Corey said, also suddenly sober.  
  
“Fuck fucking fucking yes,” Piper squeaked, also sober now.  
  
“Give them a fucking break. They were the ones who found Emmitt and brought him back.” Ashkii said.  
  
“Plus, it is fucking pirate metal, anyone, no matter their age, drinks to pirate metal in Zootopia. Also, alcohol is absolutely nothing compared to night howlers,” Emmitt said in a deep voice (when he talks he sounds like Corey Tailor from Slipknotter). Both he and Ashkii were sober now as well. This is because when otters and other mustelids consume alcohol, we can metabolize it and then get sober pretty soon.  
  
Suddenly, Chief Bogo slammed on the brakes. “DID YOU JUST SAY YOU WERE AT AN ALESTORM SHOW!” He shouted.  
  
“Fuck yeah all of us were.” I told him.  
  
“Okay because it was fucking Alestorm I will give them a break because Alestorm is fucking awesome. I saw them on the Warped Tour a few years back and they fucking ripped. I even did the meet and greet with them. I had to do a bunch of shit tonight which is why I couldn’t go.” Bogo was not angry anymore. “Because of this I will let you go. If Alestorm had existed when I was young I would have totally drunk to them when I was underage.”  
  
Bogo turned the car around and dropped us back off at the venue, while Nick and Hopps stayed in the cruiser and were driven back home. We drove back home as well, and it was 4 of the clock in the Am morning when we got home. That was the best night fucking ever.


	3. An Offer He Couldn't Refuse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alister meets with his friend Duke Weaselton, who reveals that he has been hired as extra crew at a Powerwolf concert. Alister is invited, along with the rest of his family, to stand sidestage.

Chapter 3

The next morning I was sitting in my room wearing a Rumahoy shirt and eating salt and vinegar chips and drinking an Izze and listening to Unleash the Archers and watching heavy metal movies like "This Is Spinal Tap". I then looked at my Facebook to see that Duke Weaselton was selling illegal Fireworks just a few blocks away. I got up and left the house.  
I arrived at Duke Weaselton’s definitely completely legal firework stand, which was the name of his new business. He was there wearing a black Powerwolf shirt and athletic shorts. He also had corpse paint on his face.  
  
“ALISTER! HALLO! IT IS SO GREAT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!” Weaselton said in Norwegian.  
  
Duke Weaselton is a Weasel that likes to do illegal shit such as selling bootleg movies, dog porn, and fireworks and also stealing shit and burning churches like I like to do (at least that last part). He is also half Norwegian which is why he speaks it.  
  
“I am here to buy some Fireworks. Give me the biggest one you have.”  
  
“Oooooh why do you want the fireworks?” Weaselton continued.  
  
“I want to burn down a church in a cool way, what way other than buying some fireworks.”  
  
All of the other normies in line that weren’t into church burnings like Weaselton and I were gave us weird looks.  
  
“Oooh, well Powerwolf is playing a show tonight and they want a church burned down as part of their show and some cool pyro. They already hired me, and they need someone else as well. I will tell them that you are equipped.” Weaselton inquired.  
  
Powerwolf is the fucking biggest band in the fucking world and tonight are about to put on the biggest ticketed concert ever with 300,000 tickets sold. They are so big that they are actually playing in a massive park. They already sold out the Zootennial Stadium 3 times, and have sold out the largest concert venue, the 40,000 capacity Zoo2 Arena even more times. They’re so big that they don’t even play festivals anymore.  
  
“yes, I already have my tickets to see Powerwolf tonight. I was at last night’s Alestorm show and love going to concerts two nights in a row.”  
“Alright. Which fireworks should we use?” said Weaselton.  
  
“I’ll take that one. the big one. The Big Epic Ragin’ Rippin’ Red Rocket Mega Shooter,” I said, pointing to one that was three times as tall as me and five times as tall as Duke.  
  
“Alright, that will be completely free for you because I know you and we like to burn churches together. Also, whatever is not sold today will be used at the Powerwolf show.”  
  
“All fucking righty,” I said and started to leave before I remembered something else.  
  
“Does this mean we have exclusive backstage passes to the Powerwolf show tonight?” I asked.  
  
“It does indeed,” Weaselton said, “I will cee u at the show tonight. “  
  
“I’ll see you they’re too,” I said.  
  
I walked home carrying the red rocket firework. I then went inside. Corey was lying down on the couch playing Fortnite on his iPad. Piper was kicking a soccer ball against the wall and screaming expletives like she usually does. Emmitt had just returned from the garden after watering some new flowers, and Ashkii was playing “Swedish Pagans” by Sabaton on the Hurdy Gurdy.  
  
“I have some very important news for all of you!” I exclaimed.  
  
“NOOOOOOOOOOB!” Corey shouted at his iPad as he defeated another player.  
  
“What the fucking shit is this goddamn news?” Asked Pieper.  
  
“And why are you carrying that giant firework. What the fuck are you about to do with it?” Asked Emmitt. Ashkii looked up as well and immediately dropped her hurdy gurdy.  
  
“I was just with Duke Weaselton and I was buying this firework.”  
  
“You bought illegal fireworks from that Norwegian dude?” Corey asked.  
  
“Half Norwegian, but yes I did indeed, but I haven’t gotten to the good news yet.”  
  
“What is said good news?” Ashkii asked.  
  
“Well, Duke and I have been hired by Powerwolf to burn down a church by using fireworks as part of tonight’s show.”  
  
“HOLY FUCKING SHIET!” Piper screamed as she kicked her soccer ball which knocked over a flower vase that smashed on the ground. No one really cared because we were too excited.  
  
“This also means that we all get backstage passes to tonight’s show and get to stand side stage to watch the band while they perform.  
  
Piper’s jaw dropped to the ground. The exact same thing happened with Corey, Emmitt and Ashkii.  
  
“This is much better than playing Fortnite,” Corey said.  
  
“Fuck yes we are totally fucking in.” Ashkii said.


	4. Lupus Dei, Ardenti Ecclesia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alister Otterton, along with the rest of his family and Duke Weaselton, meet Powerwolf backstage and watch their show (the biggest concert in the world) from a sidestage area. Alister and Duke burn down the church, as suggested by the band, and have the time of their lives. However, after the show is done, a suspicious figure appears and a mystery starts to surround the band.

Chapter 4  
We arrived at the venue that Powerwolf was playing at. It was in Zootopia Main Park. This was the area that had a natural amphitheater and would sometimes have concerts and festivals, but nothing of this size with 300,000 in attendance. There was a barricade because of the size, and it was already 30 feet from the stage. The stage was a massive stage that was full of ramps and lights for and a giant Powerwolf backdrop. There were two massive video screens flanking the stage on each side.  
  
I then looked and saw that there was a massive church behind the stage. I assumed that this was the church that was going to be burned down during the show.  
  
We walked to the backstage area. Duke Weaselton was already there with a bunch of fireworks and was still wearing corpse paint and a Powerwolf shirt. I still had the Red Rocket and was wearing my Rumahoy shirt. Emmitt was wearing full Angus McFluff XIII armor complete with the Hammer of Glory. Ashkii was now wearing a Nekrogoblikon shirt. Corey was wearing a Hammerfall shirt, and Piper was still in her soccer uniform.  
  
“Hallo all,” Weaselton said, “I have heard that the band will be arriving soon.”  
  
The crowd was gathering in front of the stage. Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde were front row, right on the barricade. All the security guards were really big and I recognized officer Clawhauser as one of them for tonights show. I looked out and saw the massive crowd all the way back.  
  
Soon we saw some bodyguards walking in. They were escorting the members of Powerwolf. I could not believe that they were right there in front of me. The members were all wolves, except for the singer who was actually a wolverine  
  
*Otter’s note, I am talking about the mustelid Wolverine, Gulo gulo. Hugh Jackman does not sing for Powerwolf.  
  
“Guten Tag,” said their singer, Attila Dorn, in German, “are you the ones who we hired to burn down that church.”  
  
I could barely answer, as my heart was absolutely racing at the prospect of meeting the biggest band in the whole fucking world.  
  
“OH YES, IT’S US! WE WERE THE ONES WHO ARE GOING TO BURN DOWN THE CHURCH!” Weaselton said. “Me and him,” he said as he pointed to me.  
  
“Hey what is your name,” asked Matthew Greywolf, the lead guitarist.  
  
“Weaselton, Duke Weaselton,” answered Duke.  
  
“And I am Alister Otterton,” I said, “OMFG I can’t fucking believe that this is actually happening!”  
  
“And the rest of the Lutrine bunch?” asked Charles Greywolf, the rhythm guitarist.  
  
“That’s my uncle Emmitt, his wife Ashkii, and my two cousins Corey and Piper.” I said.  
  
“We will warm up soon,” said Falk Maria Schlegel, the keyboardist, “but first we will give you directions on how we will like the fireworks set up in the church and how we can burn it.”  
  
We walked into the church with the band. It was an old church that was falling apart and had not been used in a really long time.  
  
“Alright, so which song should we start on?” I asked.  
  
“Resurrection by Erection,” Attila Dorn responded.  
  
“Oh well of course,” I replied, “I mean, one of the fireworks we have is called the ‘Red Rocket’”.  
  
I looked over and realized that Weaselton was already setting up the fireworks.  
  
“DO YOU THINK THIS LOOKS GOOD?” he asked, his extremely nasally voice echoing throughout the building.  
  
“Yes, it does,” said Roel van Helden, the drummer, in an even thicker Dutch accent.  
  
“We are ready to go! Let’s go back to the green room and then we can soon get this fucking show started!” Dorn said, in a much thicker German accent.  
  
We walked back to the backstage area and were then led to side-stage area where we could watch the band.  
  
“I can’t fucking believe I’m actually seeing Powerwolf this close,” Emmitt said.  
  
“I still haven’t seen Powerwolf,” said Ashkii.  
  
“Neither have I,” Corey said.  
  
“I fucking haven’t either,” squealed Piper with delight.  
  
A big black curtain covered the massive stage. We peeked through and looked out at the crowd, 300,000 strong. We then looked back and saw the band walk up towards the stage as their intro stated playing.  
  
Powerwolf took their places on stage. The curtain then dropped as the band went right into “Sanctified with Dynamite.” The roar of the crowd was louder than the band when they came on. Pyro was going off all over the stage. As soon as the song kicked in, a bunch of massive fireworks (not the ones in the church) blasted off at the front the stage. Dorn was leaning into his microphone stand while the guitarists (who were not brothers despite having the same last name), were running everywhere on stage. Roel van Helden was pounding on his massive drumkit while Falk Maria Schlegel was dancing around his keyboard, having the time of his life.  
  
I looked out and saw the crowd in motion. I tried to count all the pits. It was hard but I found out that there were 150 mosh pits total. I totally wanted to get into one of them but being right on the side of the stage where the band was also very cool. When they played “Army of the Night,” Weaselton and I went completely crazy, as that was our favorite of their songs. Piper and Corey also loved that one, but they were partial to “Incense and Iron,” while Emmitt and Ashkii loved “We Drink Your Blood.”  
  
They kept playing the show, not until 3 hours in did they do their first encore. As they walked towards the backstage area, they came right to us.  
  
“Hey, you two, it’s your time,” said Falk Maria Schlegel, “are you ready to burn or what?”  
  
We walked back into the church and found the fuse to the fireworks. It was right at the entrance so we can make a quick escape.  
  
A porcupine then trundled up holding a large video camera. “You’re about to be on the big screen,” he said with a thick Southern accent.  
  
Schlegel and Dorn then gave us the command and we lit the fuses with our matches and hurried back to the stage with the band. They walked back on and went right into “Resurrection by Erection”.  
  
As soon as they started playing the song, the Red Rocket firework burst through the roof ad into the sky, creating a massive explosion, the rest of the fireworks went off bust above the roof, and it caught on fire.  
  
The fire spread quickly, soon to the spire and the walls as the crowd looked in awe. Weaselton and I formed a two individual mosh pit, and then Corey and Piper joined in as we watched the band play, they’re hour long encore set.  
  
Finally, it was time for one more song. The band then started to Play “We Drink Your Blood,” and the spire of the church fell exactly when the song kicked in. We looked and saw the security guards on the barricade absolutely overwhelmed with crowd surfers and huge amounts of pyro going off on the stage.  
  
The band took their final bows while the church stopped burning. The band then walked back to the back stage and we followed.  
  
“Holy fucking shit I can’t believe we just did that,” Attila Dorn said.  
  
“Next time,” Falk Maria Schlegel said, “we go even bigger.”  
  
“Where the hell are we gonna do that?” Asked Matthew Greywolf.  
  
“Uhhhh, I dunno, the airport?” The bandmates chuckled.  
  
“Holy Shit that was fucking intensely awesome,” Piper squeaked as she gave fist bumps to the members.  
  
“Of fuck I fucking love you guys,” I said.  
  
“I haven’t seen shit like that in all of my life,” Weaselton said.  
  
The band went back into their dressing room, as I looked through my phone at the pictures I took. There were so many. I still decided to post them all on Instagram and Facebook.  
  
“This is going to be a total night to remember,” Emmitt said.  
  
“I don’t think I even need to play Fortnite again,” said Corey.  
  
“Best fucking concert ever!” Exclaimed Ashkii.  
  
I then looked up and saw some movement. It was wearing a robe and a horn-like crown, with a mask that had red eyes.  
  
“Did you see that?” asked Piper.  
  
“Yes, I did,” I responded, “right that way.”  
  
“That totally looked like Zargothrax,” Corey said.  
  
“Probably just a cosplayer like me,” Emmitt said, holding his replica of the Hammer of Glory.  
  
A few minutes later, Falk Maria Schlegel came back to us.  
  
“Have you seen Attila Dorn in the past 10 minutes?” he asked us.  
  
“He’s probably just taking a piss,” Matthew Greywolf responded from behind him.  
  
“No, he’s definitely masturbating somewhere,” Charles Greywolf responded, “He always does that after shows.”  
  
“Well, we kinda have to get home now, it is very late and a pretty long drive back to our house,” Ashkii told them.  
  
“Hey is something wrong?” Nick Wilde asked as he walked back with Judy Hopps. Both had shown their badges on the way in.  
  
“We can’t find Attila Dorn,” replied the keyboardist, “We think he is either pissing or masturbating but if we can’t find him before curfew, we will need help.”  
  
“Okay we are on that,” Hopps replied.  
  
The rest of the Otterton family and I got back to the car (thankfully most of the crowd already left so we missed the traffic) and drove home to the Rainforest District. Now it was 4:30 am and I went down to the basement to go to bed.


	5. Night Of The Wereweasel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Upon waking up the next day, Alister learns that Attila Dorn went savage. Someone has brought back the night howlers. He goes to tell Duke Weaselton while Emmitt goes to tell Mr. Big. Emmitt recieves a cryptic message as they learn that Dorn isn't the only one.

Chapter 5

The next morning, I got up. I washed my face, brushed my teeth, put in my contact lenses, and put on my clothes. Today I was wearing an Aether Realm shirt and of course another pair of zipper pocket shorts.  
  
I was in the bathroom, taking a piss, when suddenly I was startled.  
  
“HEY ALISTER! GET YOUR FUCKING ASS UP HERE RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT!” Shouted Emmitt loudly.  
  
I washed my paws and rushed upstairs to see the fuss.  
  
Everyone was gathered in the TV room. Corey had dropped his phone, Piper had dropped her soccer ball, Emmitt had dropped his flowers, and Ashkii had dropped her Hurdy-Gurdy.  
  
The headline on TV said “Legendary metal singer mystery. Gone savage?”  
  
I dropped my breakfast plate on the floor, and it shattered.  
  
The two reporters, Peter Moosebridge and Fabienne Growley, were describing what happened last night.  
  
“Attila Dorn, the lead singer of Power Metal band Powerwolf, has gone missing. This disappearance happened right after they came off stage from the biggest concert ever,” Growley said.  
  
“This is where he was last seen,” said Moosebridge.  
  
Webcam footage then came up. It was Attila Dorn. He was going absolutely fucknuts in the brain. He was making growling and screeching noises and thrashing around a suitcase. He had completely destroyed the suitcase and then bounded off on all fours.  
  
Piper was the first to speak. “Was it the…”  
  
“NIGHT HOWLERS?!”  
  
Everyone’s jaw dropped, even further than yesterday.  
  
“Oh shit!” Emmitt said, “I gotta go tell Mr. Big.” He rushed out the door and raced away in his car.  
  
“And I have to tell Weaselton,” I said, and rushed out on my scooter. I was in such a hurry that I even forgot my helmet.  
  
I looked for where Weaselton was. He was usually in this area. Suddenly I saw smoke and headed right towards the source.  
  
I saw a burning church. Duke was sitting right outside of it, still in corpse paint but wearing no shirt this time. He was drinking a Pina Colada while playing “Norwegian Reggaeton” by Nanowar of Steel.  
  
“WEASELTON!” I shouted, “DID YOU HEAR WHAT HAPPENED!”  
  
“Oh shit,” he said, “Attila Dorn fucking vanished. We all thought he was masturbating or taking a piss.”  
  
“Yeah but did you see…”  
  
“Yes, he went totally missing, no one knows where the fuck he went. That is why I’m burning down this church and drinking my pain away,” he responded.  
  
“But he went savage.”  
  
“Oh, shit really?” Weaselton asked  
  
“Yes, I am not shitting you. I think someone has brought back the night howlers.”  
  
“OH FUCK!” He shouted.  
  
“Yes, I remember you stealing that shit from a store some time ago to give to that Doug motherfucker.”  
  
“Oh fuck, I did used to do that. But since then I’ve cleaned up and now instead focus on church burnings and selling dangerous shit to little kids.”  
  
“Yes, that Doug motherfucker. He was the one who shot that shit at my uncle. Emmitt had also known about this before it happened to him, which was why he was targeted. I thought all the motherfuckers that did that were locked up.”  
  
“Well fuck,” Weaselton said, “I had nothing to do with it this time. Buuuuuut I’m gonna go now,” he ran away quickly.  
  
I got back on my scooter and rushed back home.  
  
I arrived back at the house at the exact same time that Emmitt did. We both rushed back inside.  
  
“I told Weaselton,” I said. “He has absolutely nothing to do with it, as I was with him when the incident took place.”  
  
Everyone was looking at us.  
  
“Mr. Big told me some weird cryptic shit,” Emmitt said.  
  
“What was it?” Asked Ashkii.  
  
“He started tapping a code out.”  
  
“Morse code?” Corey asked.  
  
“Yes, it was Morse code. He then said ‘10:22’.”  
  
“Uuuuuum right about now it’s 1:30.”  
  
“And then he told me that ‘more are coming’.”  
  
“OH FUCKING SHIT!” Piper shouted.  
  
I decided to start looking at my phone. I opened that page for Metal Injection and scrolled down. Suddenly, another article made my jaw drop.  
The title of the article said, “Following Dorn, More Metal Singers go Savage and Disappear.”  
  
“Uhhhh, everyone?”  
  
“What is it?”  
  
“Attila Dorn wasn’t the only one,” I said.  
  
I then pulled up the article on a computer and everyone sat around. It mentioned even more metal singers for many of my favorite bands. There were also videos and pictures caught of the animals going savage.  
  
“Isn’t that Joakim from Sabaton?” Asked Piper.  
  
“Yes it is,” Ashkii responded, “and he’s gone savage as well.”  
  
“Oh shit!” Emmitt said, “Francesco from Wind Rose got it too.”  
  
“And Dragonforce,” Corey said, “both their new singer and their old singer.”  
  
“And Vison Jones from Aether Realm,” I said.  
  
“Oh fuck,” Ashkii said, “why the fuck is someone bringing this back?”  
  
“Night Howlers are fucking old,” Piper said.  
  
“Except this time, everyone knows that the Night Howlers are the culprit,” Emmitt said, “The only thing that has to happen is finding whoever is doing this.”  
“I also noticed a similarity to each incident,” I said.  
  
“That they are all metal singers?” Corey asked.  
  
“They are all mustelids like us.”  
  
Everyone then looked at me.  
  
“See look, Joakim Marten is a Pine Marten, both Dragonforce singers are both Tayras, Francesco Badgerieri is, of course, a badger, and Vison Jones from Aether Realm is a mink.”  
  
“So you think whoever is doing this is targeting Mustelids?”  
  
“Yes, that is a big possibility. And mustelids that are metalheads.”  
  
“But don’t all mustelids like metal?” Piper Asked.  
  
“Yes all mustelids like metal, and most metal singers are also mustelids,” I said.  
  
“We have to find whoever is doing this,” Emmitt said.  
  
We were pretty scared now.


	6. The Wizard's Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Otterton family makes a shocking revelation about who is behind this wave of Night Howlers, and finds out that the one doing this is right there in front of them.

Chapter 6  
I ran outside and started screaming. I wasn’t sure if I was going to be next, or if someone else in the family was next. I hoped that they were just targeting the ones who were already singers, because I can’t sing for shit or play any instruments. I decided to walk around the backyard, behind our house was a river that was lined by Sitka Spruce. I watched the water flow to calm myself down.  
  
I took deep breaths and did a few calming exercises. I then stated to fall asleep when I heard a door opening and some rushing outside.  
  
“Hey Alister!” It was Piper, “we have to show you something. It is extremely important.”  
  
“What did you find now?” I asked, my brain still in a complete fog.  
  
“We found a clue to the savageness.”  
  
Suddenly I stood up and rushed with my cousin back into the house.  
  
Corey was sitting on the couch on his phone, with Emmitt and Ashkii looking as well.  
  
“I think I just found a big clue,” said Corey.  
  
He then pulled up a video. It was Brittney from Unleash the Archers. Britney is a Sea Otter, which is much bigger than I am and also has a bigger snoot as well.  
  
“This show was in Muskegon,” Corey said.  
  
Everyone paused.  
  
“Wait, Muskegon? Isn’t that where you’re from?” Piper asked, looking at me.  
  
“Yes it is stoatally is where I’m from.”  
  
Muskegon is a complete shithole town right on the shores of this ultra-filthy-shitty-polluted lake that catches on fire all the time. There are paper factories everywhere and everything fucking smells bad and all of the buildings are ugly. Also, bands rarely ever come to Muskegon except for one that I did manage to see one day (in case you are wondering it was Three Days Graze). I was kicked out of the house at 14 and moved into the Otterton home in Zootopia. I also had moved in during that period of time when Emmitt went missing. It was a bit afterwards that we finally found out that it was the night howlers.  
  
“Okay, keep watching this.”  
  
I kept watching, Brittney was walking out of the venue and towards the tour van. Suddenly, a dark shadowy figure appeared. The figure then stabbed Brittney and disappeared. Within a few seconds, the sea otter started to go savage as well. She scratched the van and the trailer and bounded off in a weird way.  
  
“Wait zoom in on that shadowy figure,” Emmitt said.  
  
We zoomed in on the figure and looked. It was wearing a dark robe and a mask, the knife looked magic.  
  
“Wait is that…”  
  
“ZARGOTHRAX!”  
  
Everyone was now looking at Piper after she shouted the name of the evil sorcerer.  
  
“Nah it’s probably a cosplayer,” Corey said.  
  
“No, it is totally the fucking wizard,” Piper argued, “Zargothrax totally exists in the real world.”  
  
Piper is still young enough that she thinks that shit like wizards and magic are actually real.  
  
“Someone has been going around dressed as Zargie and stabbing mustelids with a ‘knife of evil’” Emmitt said.  
  
“They’ve found the night howler serum and dipped the knife into it,” I said, “Oh shit I’m texting Weaselton right now.”  
  
I pulled out my phone and immediately texted Duke’s number. I told him that “Someone has been going around dressed as Zargothrax and stabbing mammals by using a knife laced with night howlers.”  
  
I sent the text and awaited a response. It came.  
  
“THE KNIFE OF EVIL!” The text said. “They’re targeting Mustelids and the metal community, which is already majority mustelid.”  
  
“Whoever it is, I’m going to try to find them,” I texted back, “and make sure they get their time.”  
  
“YOU DON’T FUCK WITH THE POWER OF HOOTS!” he texted to me.  
  
“I just texted Hopps,” Ashkii said, “I told them to be on the lookout for a suspect dressed as the evil wizard Zargothrax.”  
  
Suddenly, I saw the news we were talking about posted by all of the bands and the pages I like. Suddenly, the house phone started to ring. Emmitt immediately rushed to pick it up.  
  
“HELLO WHO IS THIS!” he shouted into the phone. A short pause followed. “What do you need to tell me.” A very long pause then followed. “OH FUCK HE’S IN THE RAINFOREST DISTRICT NOW!” He then slammed down the phone.  
  
“Zargie’s in rainforest district now!, right at the skyride!”  
  
“We gotta go there to find him,” Ashkii said, “and call emergency services.”


	7. Chaos Will Reign Eternal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After finding out what Zargothrax was doing, they go to find the wizard. Zargothrax then takes the Ottertons, along with Nick Wilde and Judy Hopps, through the terrorvortex where the savage mammals used to be. After Zargothrax reveals who they really are, they try to kill the Ottertons, along with everyone else there.

Chapter 7  
  
We all got into the car and rushed towards the skyride. We were driving way over the speed limit and had “Rise of the Chaos Wizards” by Gloryhammer blasting on full volume. We drove until we finally got to the skyride. There, we saw Nick and Judy pull up in their cruiser, we both got out.  
  
We all rushed out of the car and ran towards the skyride. We almost again bumped into that same marmot I’d seen the other day.  
  
“WATCH IT MUSKRATS!” he shouted. He then gave Nick Wilde the middle finger and trundled away once more.  
  
“Ahhhh, my old friend, the scout bully,” Nick Wilde said.  
  
“Alright, let’s go find this impasta,” Judy Hopps said.  
  
We rounded the corner and there was Zargothrax.  
  
“‘MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA!” he laughed maniacally, “YOU HAVE FALLEN RIGHT INTO MY TRAP! YOU WILLL SOON END UP LIKE ANGUS MCFLUFF XIII ENDED UP.”  
  
“Hey, whoever is in that costume take it off, or I will call in for backup,” Hopps said.  
  
“YOU ARE NO MATCH FOR MY EVIL POWERS. SOON YOU WILL ALL BE TERRORIZED!”  
  
“Does he mean he’s gonna make us go savage?” Piper asked.  
  
“LATER, I WILL, BUT FIRST, SOMETHING HAS TO HAPPEN!”  
  
“Where are the savage mammals?!” asked Nick Wilde, “Show us where the savage mammals are, and we can do this more peacefully.”  
  
“OH YOU REALLY WANT TO SEE WHERE THEY WENT!” Zargothrax bellowed. “I GUESS THAT I WILL HAVE TO SHOW YOU!”  
  
We waited in suspense.  
  
“TRANNSA OLC DRAOIDH!” * He bellowed as he struck his glowing staff on the ground.  
  
Suddenly, the air behind him started to swirl. It kept swirling and swirling until a green and black swirling hole opened up in the air.  
  
“Oh shit, is that the…”  
  
“TERRORVORTEX! IT’S THE TERRORVORTEX!” Piper shouted.  
  
“You were right Piper,” I said, “we should never have doubted you.”  
  
Zargothrax then looked at all of us and said, “YOU WILL NOW SEE!”  
  
He grabbed his staff and sent us flying through the hole.  
  
I looked around as we continued through the terrorvortex. All I could see was flashing and changing colors. I called out for everyone, but no one responded. The travel through the wormhole felt like an eternity, but finally we were spat out.  
  
I looked around, and there was everyone.  
  
“Is everyone okay?” I asked.  
  
“Yeah, just a bit shaken by the terrorvortex,” Ashkii responded.  
  
“What the fuck did we just go through?” Nick Asked.  
  
“THAT WAS THE TERRORVORTEX!” Judy Hopps shouted.  
  
Piper then peeped up, “look, the sky.”  
  
We looked up. The sky was red, just like on the cover of Legends from Beyond the Galactic Terrorvortex. There was a giant statue of Zargothrax, right on top of a mountain.  
  
“I think we’ve arrived into another dimension,” Corey said.  
  
“This is the same place from the album,” Piper said.  
  
“I knew you were right,” I told her, “Zargothrax is totally real.”  
  
Just then, Zargothrax landed right in front of us.  
  
“THIS IS WHERE YOU WANTED TO GO!”  
  
“Nah, we never said anything about traveling into another dimension,” Nick Wilde said, “but I think you should probably get your Darth Vader ass back up into that death star.”  
  
“SHUT THE FUCK UP!”  
  
“Nah seriously,” Nick continued, “If you would have just showed us we would already be done here.”  
  
“YOU HAVE REACHED THE LAST STRAW!” said the evil sorcerer, “NOW YOU WILL PAY!”  
  
Just then, Zargothrax twirled his staff in the air and said, “PHALANGE X I!”  
  
Suddenly, from all around us, “Paralyzer” by Finger Eleven started to play and Nick Wilde turned into a toilet.  
  
“No Nick!” Judy exclaimed, “you’ve become a… a… a… TOILET!”  
  
“Ha-ha, with the evil power of evil magic and Finger Eleven, I can turn anyone into a toilet,” Zargothrax said as he laughed maniacally. “Next up will be you if you don’t shut up!”  
  
“Just show us where the savage mammals are,” Hopps said.  
  
“Alright. Just look beyond this bend and you will see,” he said, as we followed him around said bend.  
  
“Holy shi…”  
  
I could not believe my eyes.  
  
“Attila Dorn.”  
  
“Joakim Marten.”  
  
“Brittney Seas.”  
  
“Francesco Badgerieri.”  
  
“Both Dragonforce singers.”  
  
“And Vison ‘Mink’ Jones.”  
  
There, right there in another dimension were all the savage mammals.  
  
“Now I’ve shown you what happened to them, and now I can tell you what has happened to me!”  
  
We all waited.  
  
“I was activated nearly 1,000 years ago,” the wizard said. “It was the year 1022.”  
  
“1022!” Exclaimed Emmitt. “That is what Mr. Big said to me.”  
  
“I was told to kill Angus McFluff II, the son of who the original Zargothrax tried to kill.”  
  
“Wait, you’re not the original?” Piper asked.  
  
“I was frozen in a pool of liquid ice, just like the original.”  
  
“Oh shit.”  
  
“And was awoken in the city of Zootopia.”  
  
“Hold on,” I said, “he just said that he wasn’t the original.”  
  
“Then that means it’s…”  
  
“ZARGOTHRAX ALPHA CLONE ONE!” Ashkii shouted.  
  
“Oh my fucking god,” Emmitt said. “That was what Mr. Big tapped out in Morse code. He was reciting ‘Activate Zargothrax Alpha Clone One’”.  
  
“At the end of ‘The Fires of Ancient Cosmic Destiny’.”  
  
“That is right,” the wizard continued.  
  
“Alright, now that we know what is happening,” Ashkii said, “We just need to find Angus and use his help to defeat him.”

“Angus McFluff is dead!” Zargothrax shouted, “And you will never defeat me.”  
  
Oh fuck it was about to get real.  
  
“Now you can see what I really look like.”  
  
Zargothrax then started to take off the mask.  
  
“Wait is that…”  
  
“BELLWETHER!”  
  
“Dawn Bellwether?” Corey asked.  
  
“Holy fuck I thought you were supposed to be in prison,” I said.  
  
“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!’ Piper shouted.  
  
“Now you will hear my full story,” Bellwether said.  
  
We couldn’t believe it. Bellwether was a Zargothrax clone.  
  
“I am still Zargothrax Alpha Clone One,” said Bellwether, “I was awoken one year in the city of Zootopia. I realized how much time had passed, and I needed to disguise myself, so what more of a disguise than this innocent little figure,” she continued. “I eventually became the assistant mayor of the city. One day I discovered that the Night Howlers were still here. I still have memories from the original Zargothrax, despite being a clone. The original sorcerer had used those toxic flowers.”  
  
“Oh shit,” Ashkii said, “So that’s what happened to the Unicorns 1,000 years back.”  
  
“And that is how the Knife of Evil works,” said Emmitt, “Proletius and Angus both got the Night Howlers. Oh fuck.”  
  
“I decided to join in on this, and create the savage predator conspiracy,”  
  
“But why predators?” Judy asked.  
  
“Because Angus, Hoots, Ralathor, Proletius, they were all predators. Hoots was a wolf, Ralathor was a badger, Proletius was a bear, and Angus, like you,” she said as she looked at me and my family, “was an otter.”  
  
“Yeah but they only went after you because you had gone after Angus.”  
  
“SILENCE!” she shouted. “In this timeline, you could pretty much put the potion into a little paintball and shoot it at the target.”  
  
“Okay, I just have a question for you,” I said, “How the fuck did you escape from prison?”  
  
“Ha-ha,” replied Bellwether, “I made another clone of myself and then activated that to stay in my prison cell. All Zargothrax clones have memories of the original Zargothrax.”  
  
“Alrighty-then,” I replied, “Cool story!”  
  
“Now, it is time for you all to go the way of Angus and Proletius,” she pulled out the Knife of Evil.  
  
“Piper?” I said, “I’m sorry that I never believed in you.”  
  
“It’s okay,” she replied.  
  
“I guess if we are all going to die here,” Emmitt said, “We should be together.”  
  
Bellwether came charging forth with the blade when suddenly, the skies opened up.  
  
  
*Otter’s note, “trannsa olc draoidh” means “passage evil wizard” in Scottish Gaelic.


	8. The Otter, The Hurdy-Gurdy, and the Furniture Store

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before Bellwether/Zargothrax can cause any harm, a new force intervenes. They come in to assist with the defeating of the evil wizard. It is none other than Angus himself.

Chapter 8  
  
A small green figure came flying down from the sky, leaving behind it a trail of blue and yellow. Right when Bellwether had the blade within inches of our whiskers, the green figure swooped in and knocked her out.  
  
After the dust had settled on the ground, we could finally see who the figure was. It was an otter, like me, but wearing green armor, a green cape, an eyepatch, a Santa hat, and carrying a giant hammer.  
  
“HOLY SHIT!” I said.  
  
“It’s Angus McFluff,” Corey said.  
  
“Except now,” said Ashkii, “He has become Odin.”  
  
“I TOLD YOU THAT THIS WHOLE THING WAS REAL!” Piper shouted.  
  
“Hallå,” said Angus in Swedish, ”Odin has arrived, HOOTS style.”  
  
”Oh Odin,” said Judy, ”You actually came to our rescue.”  
  
”Yes I did,” he continued, ”Straight from the Itreea. After I had been stabbed by the night howlers and jumped into the volcanic lava or Schiehallion, I immediately ascended to Valhalla and became Odin. Over time, I turned Valhalla into an entire furniture store. Now I see, it is time to defeat Zargothrax Alpha Clone One.”  
  
This was totally real, as both Angus and Zargothrax had confirmed it.  
  
”You will never defeat me,” Bellwether said, ”I will soon ascend to be the true god of this dimension.”  
  
”KIVIK!” Shotuted Angus.  
  
A flying couch materialized in the air and knocked Bellwether against a stone wall.  
  
”Oh how pitiful, a fucking couch, come taste the power of CHAO-” Bellwether was interrupted as Angus sent a flying TV stand right at her head.  
  
”Oh you really think you all have it,” said Bellwether, ”So pathetic. Soon I will become a god and this whole dimension will be destroyed, along with all of you.”  
  
Bellwether came charging forth, bringing her army of savage mustelids with her. ”YOU SHALL ALL DIE!”  
  
Suddenly, Odin McFluff XIII dealt a blow to the evil ovid with his Hammer of Glory. Bellwether was soon knocked out cold.  
  
”THANK YOU SO MUCH ODIN!” said Piper, ”We are all saved now.”  
  
”You are so very welcome. Now I can return to the skies above to make more sofas and-”  
  
Bellwether got back up again, complete fire in her eyes. She charged at us once more. ”TIME FOR YOU TO DIEEEEEEEEEEEE!”  
  
Suddenly she was hit with a loud ”BONK!” and fell to the ground.  
  
”I don’t feel so good,” she said, as she dissolved into dust.  
  
I looked over at Odin, ”That was not me I swear,” he said.  
  
I kept looking over and then I saw.  
  
It had been Ashkii, she had just used her Hurdy Gurdy to defeat the evil wizard.  
  
”Ashkii?” Emmitt asked, ”You still have that thing with you.”  
  
To which Askii replied, ”A wise man once said, keep your friends close and your hurdy gurdy closer.” She then started playing ”Chomp Chomp” by Alestorm.  
  
”Mrs. Otterton,” Judy said, ”Thank you so much for saving me.”  
  
”You are so welcome!”  
  
The two hugged, just like they did when Emmitt was missing. Ashkii then went back to hug Emmitt.  
  
”That was totally fucking great!” Odin McFluff said. ”Now I must make my journey back to Itreea.”  
  
”Thanks for the help,” we all said.  
  
He lowered to the ground and made a bounding leap up to the sky. We looked as he disappeared. Up there, in fact, was a giant Itreea (btw that's what it's called in this world).  
  
Suddenly, the earth started to shake.  
  
”This is it,” I said, ”This is when we go.”  
  
”Goodbye everyone,” said Ashkii.  
  
We all leaned in to each other, as the world started to collapse. Entire Mountains were falling. Soon the sky began to cave in as well.  
  
Suddenly, we heard a loud noise, as a strong force sucked us away from the ground below.


	9. To The End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When they think it's over for them, the Ottertons and crew get rescued from the other dimension and back into Zootopia. The one who rescued them is none other than Ferret Bowes from Alestorm. After everyone is restored, they meet together once again to see Otter Ogan live. They are one of Alister's favorite bamds.

Chapter 9  
  
Soon, we realized we were back in the terrorvortex. I still couldn’t see anyone.

Within seconds, we exited the wormhole. I saw the familiar skyline and realized I was back in Zootopia I looked around. There was the rest of my family. Judy was there, Nick was there but still in toilet form, and all of the savage mustelids were there as well.

“ALRIGHT YA LADDIES!”

It was Christoferret Bowes. There he was in his kilt and his “Oh Wow” hat carrying an amulet of some sort.

“IS THAT THE FUCKING AMULET OF JUSTICE?!” Piper squeaked.

“Ah fuck yes it is lads,” he said, “I just saved yarr arses.”

“Oh Ferret Bowes,” Judy Hopps said, “can you please use the amulet a few more times. My partner Nick got turned into a toilet.”

“Ah, piece of cake,” he said.

He started to sing “Paralyzer” backwards as Nick came back into his original form as a red fox.

“Ahhhh, I can finally move again,” Nick said, “transforming into a toilet is NOT comfortable.”

“Oh yes,” I said, “And can you restore the savage singers back to their original selves?”

“Well of course!” He shouted.

He waved his amulet around all of the savage creatures. One by one, each came back to being. Once they were all cured, they looked around in confusion.

“What the fuck happened and how did I get here,” Said Brittney Seas.

“T-M-H-oh hi everyone,” said Vison Jones.

“Did we just go through the fire and the flames?” asked both Dragonforce singers.

“I think I just dug too deep,” said Francesco Badgerieri.

“This deserves a Sabaton song,” said Joakim Marten.

Suddenly Attila Dorn looked at me.

“ALISTER!” he shouted and ran up to me. “So good to see you. I seriously don’t know what happened. I had just come off stage and was walking back to the tour bus so I could masturbate. Suddenly, someone came up dressed as Zargothrax. I told them that I thought their costume was very cool and almost looked like the real thing, BUT THEN THEY STABBED ME!” He said, “And I don’t remember the rest of it. Did this happen to any of you?” he said as he looked around.

All of the other singers nodded in agreement.

“But seriously what happened,” said Brittney.

“It’s a very long story,” I said, “Just to be brief, that actually was Zargothrax.”

Everyone looked.

“At least it was Alpha Clone One. We were all sent through the terrorvortex.”

All of the attention was on me now.

“Turns out, Zargothrax was actually Dawn Bellwether.”

“Holy Shit!”

“And we are about to die when Odin McFluff came to the rescue. He helped us defeat Bellwether, but it was Mrs. Otterton who dealt the final blow, with a hurdy gurdy!”

Everyone gasped.

“The world was about to end when Ferret Bowes used the Amulet of Justice to rescue us and restore everyone.”

“And I got turned into a fucking toilet,” Nick said.

Suddenly, an ambulance arrived with Dr. Madge the Honey Badger.

“Witaj, I’m here to get all of you,” she said in Polish.

She then collected all of the musteline singers. “You will all need a few days of rest before going back to your business.”

“Alright,” said Brittney, “And I’ll let my bandmates know that I’m back.”

“Me too,” said Joakim Marten.

All of the singers got transported into the ambulance. Bowes went back to his tractor. Judy and Nick went back to the police station.

“THAT WAS SO FUCKING GREAT!” Piper squealed.

“I’m glad,” said Ashkii.

“We’re all okay,” said Emmitt. “I also have to tell you all something.”

“What is it?” Asked Corey.

“Well,” Emmitt said, “I knew about the night howlers all along. Doug used to work at the Flora and Fauna plant store. One day, he smuggled in night howlers and hid them in the basement. When he was caught, he got fired. I had found out about it, as the florist community in the city is very strong. Doug knew that I had found out, and that was why he targeted me.”

“Oh shit really,” Ashkii said.

“Yes, that was why,” Emmitt replied, the two hugged again.

“But one last thing,” he said, “I had NO IDEA about this whole Zargothrax shit.”

“Okay good.”

“But Mr. Big somehow knew.”

“The only thing that matters is that we are still back together.”

“And we still have time to go to the Otter Ogan show!” shouted Corey.

“FUCK TO THE YES!” I responded.

Otter Ogan is one of my favorite bands. I heard that they fucking kill it live and are criminally underrated, often playing shows in front of less than 100 a night.  
We went back to the house and got ready for the concert. I put on the Powerwolf shirt that I got last night; Emmitt was wearing an Iron Marten shirt, Ashkii was wearing a Judas Purriest shirt from their “Firepower” tour, Corey came down in his Slipknottter shirt, while Piper was still wearing her soccer clothes but also had put on a Behemoth hat. We drove over, blaring Otter Ogan on full volume.

We arrived at the venue of the concert, which was called “The Cupboard”. It was Zootopia’s smallest concert venue, with a capacity of only 100 (there are a few smaller ones, but they rarely host shows and don’t get touring acts). There were about 70-80 total in the room. Not that much but still enough to mosh.

“ALISTER!” I heard a familiar nasally voice say.

“WEASELTON!” I responded. We hugged together.

“You won’t believe the shit I went through,” I said.

“Tell me,” Weaselton replied.

“So, as it turns out, that was Zargothrax Alpha Clone One. We were sent through the terrorvortex and then Zargothrax revealed that they were actually Bellwether. Then, Odin McFluff came down and assisted us in beating the sheep. Ashkii dealt the final blow with her hurdy gurdy. Then, Christoferret Bowes rescued us with the Amulet of Justice.”

“HOLY SHIT!” replied the weasel.

“And I got turned into a fucking toilet,” Nick said. He and Judy Hopps were also at this show.

Suddenly, Mayor Lionheart walked onstage.

“OTTER OGAN WILL BE COMING UP SOON!” He shouted.

“Damn!” Judy said, “The mayor just introduced Otter Ogan.”

“Are you ready?” I asked.

“Born ready,” said Emmitt.

“Always ready,” said Ashkii.

“Ready is my middle name,” said Corey.

“FUCK YES!” said Piper.

Suddenly the room went quiet. The intro to “Gunman” started to play. I was excited as fuck because that is my favorite song. The band members walked onstage one at a time. They then went into the full song and the whole room went completely nuts. I, however, was going crazier than anyone else in the room. I was going so crazy that Seeb Ottermann, who was an otter like me (the whole band were otters), let me sing into the microphone at one point. They continued to churn out song after song as all 75 or so mammals in the room went crazy and even got a mosh pit, a circle pit, and a wall of death formed. They played their new song “In the Dawn of the AI” and even old songs like “Winds of Vale.” They continued for about 1 hour and 30-minute set which included an encore. Weaselton and I were also stage diving throughout the show, and then the rest of my family joined in, along with Nick, Judy, and even Mr. Manchas (who also attended the show). Finally they closed with “The Things We Believe In”. and walked off stage. That was the best fucking concert ever.

“Holy shit!” I told them as I went up to their merch table. “That was the best fucking concert ever, and I was at the Powerwolf show last night.”

“Thank you so much,” Seeb Ottermann said in his thick German accent, “We don’t have that many fans but I’m pretty sure you are our most dedicated fan.”  
“Fuck yes I am,” I said, “along with the rest of my family.”

“What is your name?” Seeb Ottermann asked.

“Otterton,” I replied, “Alister Otterton.”

“Oh, so just like Alister Vale?”

“Indeed,” I replied. Alister Vale is the main character and each album follows his story.

“You were fucking fantastic,” Emmitt said.

“Small shows are the best,” Ashkii said.

“I fucking love you,” said Corey.

“Fuck fucking yes that fucking ripped,” said Piper.

“Sign my DVD,” said Weaselton as he held up a porno film.

We all took a selfie with the band. Weaselton, Hopps, and Wilde all joined in as well. Everyone bought shirts from the band as well.

Soon we all had to go.

“Thank you for the amazing adventures,” Ashkii said, “I will always remember this.”

“I love all of you so much,” I said, “I will see you again soon.”

We all piled back into the car and drove home. It was 5 in the morning and I had school the next day. I however had trouble falling asleep. I kept thinking about the show and my adventures. All I could think was one thing.

That was the best fucking weekend ever.

THE END

No animals were harmed in the making of this.


End file.
